Cast in stone

I've talked at length with Chemo Kaufman and any number of his minions. I had a couple of questions regarding the proposed change to the radiation therapy regimen which Lampenfield has answered to my satisfaction (although I'd be so much more satisfied with not having to know Lampenfield or any of his peers). So the action starts the 19th.

I'll be receiving a full dose of gemcitabine at 12:30 PM up in Walnut Creek. Radiation is applied either before or after that (but on the 19th). Then radiation continues over the next 4 business days, and on the next Wednesday, we'll start over again (big chemo and some radiation on one day followed by 4 days of radiation only), for 3 weeks. Then I'll be free to go about my business. This is a relatively progressive regimen that made sense to Kaufman, he convinced Lampenfield, and they convinced me. The rub is that it's more Gemcitabine than they have historically given with radiation. And it's a higher dose rate of radiation than they normally give on a daily basis. But it's "biologically equivalent" to the dose rate that Dr. Lampenfield and I had originally discussed. If I never use "biologically equivalent" in a sentence again it will be too soon.

I feel great. I've gained some weight. There's a tiny place in my brain that is telling me it's all an awkward mistake and very shortly I'll have a phone call or a letter saying "Oops, you can just chill, we made a mistake". OK, so probably not.

I am at peace with the plan. I'm ecstatic that once again the cancer was detected early in it's ugly arc of existence and the doctors feel there's a chance of eliminating it. And I'm achingly thankful for all the loving support I have.

Now let's kick the bastard's ass.

John